香山リカのココロの万華鏡：カゼの功名 ／東京

(Mainichi Japan) February 20, 2011
Kaleidoscope of the Heart: The unexpected upside of a cold
香山リカのココロの万華鏡：カゼの功名　／東京

Although my health is one of the few things I pride myself on, I recently came down with a cold. My fever went down after a single night, but after that I completely lost my voice.
　からだが丈夫なことだけが自慢の私なのに、不覚にもカゼを引いてしまった。熱は一晩で下がったが、そのあと声がまったく出なくなった。

A psychiatrist cannot just laugh off losing her voice. However, I discovered that my lost voice wasn't as much of a hindrance as I expected it to be. When I told my patients, my voice just a whisper, "Sorry, I have a cold ..." they would lean forward to hear me, and I felt the emotional distance between us greatly vanish.
　声の出ない精神科医、なんてしゃれにもならないが、実はそれほど不便はないことがわかった。ささやき声で「ちょっとカゼで……」と伝えようとすると、患者さんは身を乗り出してそれを聞こうとしてくれる。それだけで、距離がぐっと縮まったような感じになるのだ。

During our meetings, there were patients who would tell me, "I understand, doctor," and grasp what I was trying to say to them. There were even patients who kindly helped me out with their prescriptions. I was completely reliant on my patients, practically doing nothing but sitting and nodding.
　それからは、「先生、わかりました」と自分の話したいことの要点をかいつまんで語ってくれる人もいれば、「クスリですが、あれとあれは余ってまして……」と処方のことまで指示してくれる人もいる。こちらはおんぶにだっこ、すべてを患者さんにゆだね、うなずいているしかない。

Of course, there were times when my lost voice kept me from conveying things I wanted to, but for those things that absolutely had to be said, I could still whisper them out.
　もちろん、言いたいことが言えなくてやや困ることもあったが、どうしても必要なことははじめのようにささやき声で伝える。

Perhaps it was because the patients had to listen very closely to hear me, but for some reason I felt like my whispering got across better than when I speak normally. Even patients who normally are picky about what medicines they take simply agreed to what I said.
不思議なことに、そのほうが聞く側も真剣になるためか、よく伝わる気がする。いつもは「いや、そのクスリは好きじゃないんで」と拒みがちな人も、「はい、わかりました」と同意してくれる。

Looking back at this, it's enough to make me feel that almost all of the things I normally go on about during a consultation are in the end, perhaps needless. Maybe a few words are all that's really needed for accurate communication.
　こうしてみると、ふだんの診療であれこれしゃべっていたことのほとんどは不要だったのではないか、と思えてくる。的確なコミュニケーションのために必要な言葉なんて、本当はほんのわずかなのかもしれない。

　これぞ、ケガの功名ならぬ、カゼの功名。

The more we feel awkward or like we have something to be ashamed of, the more likely we are to increase the number of words we use in an effort to hide our uneasiness, but this only makes us seem more suspicious to others. I have told myself that in future patient consultations, I want to try to take a relaxed approach, using short sentences and only saying what is necessary.
　私たちは気まずいとき、自分に負い目があるときほど、不安な気持ちを相手に悟られないために、言葉数を多くしてペラペラしゃべってしまう傾向があるが、それでは信用をなくすばかり。私も今後の診療では、なるべく落ち着いた態度で、必要な言葉だけを短く発する“デキる精神科医”を目指そう……。

While I learned that having one's voice taken by a cold is not a necessarily negative experience for a psychiatrist seeing patients, it made me a big burden on my colleagues at the university I work at. I was supposed to proctor entrance examinations, but since I could not project my voice, another teacher had to take my place.
　「カゼで声が出ない」という事態は、診察には必ずしもマイナスにはならなかったのだが、大学では大きな迷惑をかけてしまった。入試監督にあたっていたのに、声が出せないのでは使いものにならず、会場に着いてからほかの先生にかわってもらうことになったのだ。

Even though I was present at a morning assembly of the proctors, the speaker had to announce that another professor would stand in for me. How embarrassing it was. Ah, sure enough, I had better take care of my health. (By Rika Kayama, psychiatrist)
　朝、監督集合の場に座っているのに、説明係の人が「カヤマ先生にかわりまして○○先生」と発表。ああ、恥ずかしかった。やっぱり健康には気をつけよう。

毎日新聞　2011年2月15日　地方版